Have I mentioned my daughter Abby is a drama queen? All I wanted was a beautiful baby girl who I could dress up in pretty, frilly dresses. A girl to do makeovers with and watch chick flicks with. No one prepared me for all the drama that comes with having a girl!!! There should be a how-to manual for raising girls (maybe that's the book I should write...the title should simply be "Raising a Daughter? Good Luck").
Abby can be extremely moody (must get that from her dad because I am perfectly pleasant all the time). She also is a master of the art of the getting the last word (again, a trait she must have acquired from Brian as I never like to argue). She also thinks she knows something about everything (wow....seeing a trend here....Brian might need to get some professional help). And oh the drama! I'm pretty sure Abby is a Real Housewife in training as she can turn even the tiniest thing like taking the dog out into a performance worthy of an academy award!
Last week Abby got out the shower and I noticed her toenails were really long. It was gross! I informed her they needed to be cut ASAP...she burst into tears. "I hate getting my nails cut!!! It hurts," she's screaming at me. (maybe she is subconsciously remembering the time she was like 10 months old and while clipping her nails, I nicked her skin and there was blood everywhere and I called my dad hysterically crying and told him I thought I had cut off part of her finger and he needed to come to my house quick........and I do not consider this being dramatic.....I consider this being a concerned parent.)
Since she was already crying, why not just grab the clippers and get started (still no word on my mother of the year trophy....maybe they are planning a surprise ceremony in my honor! Guessing it's taking longer than expected because Anderson Cooper is really busy, but I know he's clearing his schedule for me. Hey Anderson...tweet me @anniezeets!) Well getting started with the toenail clipping did not go well. So we decided to soak her precious toe in warm water before proceeding. After the soak, I gently started to clip........oh the horror! Abby started screaming, "You're ripping my toe off!" "Just sit still. I know it hurts a little, but we need to get that toenail out," I say. Abby's response, "Why are you trying to kill me?" At this point she is laying on the couch, wailing like someone is trying to kidnap her, her face is completely purple from crying while I am trying to actually NOT RIP OFF HER TOE. "Why did this happen to me?" she cries....like she's been the victim of some crime...not dramatic at all. I started laughing.....which led to another outburst. "Stop laughing at me! I can't believe you think it's funny to see me in pain." (Side note: I do have a tendency to think it's funny when people get hurt. I enjoy a good stumble in a parking lot, or a trip up the stairs, so Abby's statement has some truth behind it.) The idea that my kids would ever be in pain is unbearable....except for this day. The whole thing was comedy. I'm just waiting for DHS to show up at my door and say they had a report of child abuse from a neighbor who heard horrific screaming coming from the Zeets' house. Some days (like this one) I might just say to DHS, "Lock me up! At least I'd get 3 meals a day and there's no kids!" (Sorry if this offends anyone....I don't actually want to be locked up and think child abuse is about the worst sin on the planet, just using my fabulous and sarcastic sense of humor to stress my point...although I really don't have a point!) Back to "the toe". I'm finally able to gently (well sort of...) remove the ingrown nail....the ordeal is over! I get the little missy calmed down, tell her I'm sorry if I hurt her (yes, I can be a nice person) and her toe should feel better in a day or two. We bandage it all up, she is finally calm (when I say calm, I mean she isn't hysterical anymore....we still have the deep breath/sniffing combo happening) and then Tommy comes in and says, "Geez Abby, you're such a wimp." Let the hysteria begin yet again......
A friend of mine sent me this fabulous quote after reading my blog. She thought I would appreciate it and I do! Thanks Sarah!
"They know me in way no one else ever has. They open me to things I never knew existed. They drive me to insanity and push me to my depths. They are the beat of my heart, the pulse of my veins, and the energy in my soul- they are my kids"
Catch you on the flip side peeps!
Peace!
Annie
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